Stop playing the 'God Card'

I have a friend who was spending a lot of time with a female a few years back and were 'dating'. It was a summer romance, things from all appearances were clicking, seemingly moving in a lasting, positive direction. Then as the seasons began to change and the fall rhythms of life began to take hold, he ended it with them stating that he 'wasn't in the right place with God to have a relationship'. A valid reason and hard to question but then in a matter of weeks my friend was dating a new girl - apparently now 'right' with God.

I have another friend who took their faith very seriously. So serious in fact, that often when they would go to a movie with their wife they would arrive at the theater they were at and pray as to which movie God wanted them to see. Some times going as far as to leave without seeing a film because 'God was leading them elsewhere'.

Maybe you've experienced some thing like this in some form or fashion - maybe you've said this to someone, maybe you've had it said to you, maybe also have had friends who....This is not exclusive to the 'Christian' realm. Individuals from across the spectrum end or do things because they 'aren't in the right place'. It is almost as if we want to be able to place responsibility on some exterior force or feeling. And let me admit, I am not free of blame in this. I play this card - be it a veiled 'God card' - more than I'd like to acknowledge by saying some thing to extent of 'I'm not in a healthy spot' to explain my actions.

We all lack the ability to actually name our emotions, desires, and wants.

This is not to say that these 'exterior' explanations aren't valid but rather until we begin to own our own place and role in our lives - we are destine to continue to deflect, to avoid, and to dodge taking responsibility for ourselves and how our actions impact others.

Take for instance when someone ends a relationship because after praying they feel 'God is telling them to do so'. What does it then mean if the other person has also been in just as much prayer about the relationship, believes and is convinced that 'God is telling them that this other person is 'the one''? Who's right? Who is inflicting more damage?

When we play the 'God Card' we are claiming to speak for God.

We don't mean to do this but we want the decisions we make to be right and to have authority.  We don't want to be wrong and there is a comfort and ease we find in packaging our actions and desires as coming from outside ourselves.

What if my friend who ended the relationship simply told them that they got ahead of themselves and didn't want that type of relationship with them, or that they were actually just being selfish, OR that maybe the unnameable 'it' factor wasn't there for them? What if my couple friends named the fact that they didn't want to see any of the movies, or that certain types of movies place thoughts in their heads they don't like taking root, or that maybe that they had heard some thing/read a review/saw a preview that gave them an uneasy feeling about going? In the long run would any of that be so bad?

Should we be ashamed of our own personal convictions whether they come from God, ourselves, or that nasty hotdog we ate for lunch? No.As followers of Christ, we are asked to name and own our lives - both the good and the bad. Look to stories where Jesus encounters individuals, how do they end? He invites them to live. In one case He simply says 'Go and sin now more.' Jesus' challenge to them and to us is not to deflect, to own the roles we played in our past and our current decisions so that we might truly live.

And that's a hard posture to take and embrace.

But may we stop playing this game of God cards and deflection, and start doing the hard work of owning the lives we have been given - if only one moment at a time.